„We are like a family“ – is a phrase I often hear in companies, or see as part of their employer branding strategy. But let’s be honest – why is that? Family matters are not always easy. Just think of the well-known Christmas drama. So why do so many people still strive for a family environment in a corporate context?
The impact of the „family game“ on a company’s workforce should not be underestimated. In my opinion, using the term „family“ in a company can lead to difficulties. Here are five reasons why its use should definitely be reconsidered:
Seeking recognition and love within the company
It is easy to confuse the company with the family. There is a reason for the saying: "He/she is married to their job" or "The managing director is like a parent to me." If you confuse the company with the family, you are bound to be unhappy, because you will never receive the love and recognition that you would get in a real family.
Termination is often a difficult topic
It is not possible to be excluded from a family – you either you are or are not biologically part of one. If thisphilosophy also applies to the company, it can be difficult or even impossible to part with employees and/or people may be outraged when someone leaves the company, because they are leaving the company family! This can often have fatal consequences for teams effects on teams or the company atmosphere – who wants an underperformer in their team?
Performance and behavioural problems are tolerated:
This is something I have often observed this in companies that position themselves as families. Why? In a family, performance doesn't matter, what matter is unconditional love. As we all know, parents forgive almost anything because they love their children just the way they are. This is why bad behaviour or poor performance is often tolerated in companies. The actions of a family member are often overlooked.
Security in times of crisis
No one can replace a family member. Employees often seek a substitute for family members within companies, either consciously or unconsciously. In most cases, this is about finding security – but this is only possible to a limited extent. During times of crisis, companies make objective decisions about who stays and who goes. When the decision is made to part ways with an employee, the disappointment among colleagues is often considerable. They can even go as far as to literally declare "war" on the company. Why do they behave like this? The company can never fulfil the role of a family.
Constructive feedback
In a family, you can say whatever you like, and that's not always helpful! If a family atmosphere is encouraged in the workplace, there is little room for constructive feedback. When misconduct occurs in the workplace, it is often difficult to address these issues because nobody wants to "disappoint" anyone. Employees then often react inappropriately, like children – e.g. they can become defiant and stubborn.
So what should a company do when one of these issues is identified in a company?
The first step has already been taken: raising awareness and creating a sense of urgency gets the ball rolling.
What happens next? The next step is to remember that you have your own family and don’t need a „surrogate family“. This usually puts everyone at ease!
Discuss/decide internally whether to remove the term ‚family‘ from the company context. There are many other positive terms that can be used instead, such as team spirit, cohesion and togetherness, to name but a few.
If none of these options are possible, there is a very good and effective solution: a family/organisational constellation. The aim here is to bring order to a team or family so you avoid confusion. This can be helpful if you realise that the topic of family has become too integrated into the business and you need assistance to address this.
My conclusion
Finally, I would like to share one more thought: everyone should be aware that nothing and no one can replace the importance of having a family. Unfortunately, life often presents families with difficult circumstances, so it is all the more important to be aware of this and to adjust your attitude accordingly. This is crucial for achieving both professional and personal success.
